So I’ve decided to go ahead and do my personal list of top ten hottest animated
guys, and I’m going to blame it on Snow
White (yes, you know who you are), and also the fact that my fever is not
letting me sleep. It was good entertainment though.
As it always occurs with these list, this is my own personal
opinion, not the entire world, and as a matter of fact, At the beginning I was
thinking , wtf? What do I base my tastes on? These guys have nothing to do with
each other… but they do.. they do…
So the countdown begins!!!
10. Miguel – El Dorado
Ok So I’m still not quite sure how he managed to sneak into
the list instead of others with much more potential (Prince Adam, Philipp,
Aladdin and several others that did not make the cut) So I’m gonna go with: He’s
Spanish! And I favored him based on nationalism.
he also did this…
| d'aww |
Anyway he’s funny, has a great heart as he shows in the
movie, and was constantly making me laugh. So yeah!
9. Van Halen – Justice Friends
He got a Spot here, because when I was 5 I thought he was
the best. And was my imaginary boyfriend. Cuz.. he looks cool, and he has a
pink guitar!!!
Subliminal message (probably why my toddler mind did not
comprehend my fascination with this guy)
Anywho, he’s a rock star, and a superhero at the same time. And
a Viking!! Bonus points for being a Viking!!
Not to mention you never see his eyes! And that makes him all mysterious,
right! Right?..
Actually he’s dummer than a sack of cat poopie....
...But VIKING!
8. THOR
Speaking of hot Vikings (haha irony, cause they come from
the cold places. Get it?) THOR.
Viking god, he has a hammer and stuff
 |
| doesn't even look like thor, doesn't even have a hammer= don't know what the F i'm talking about. |
Actually I have never seen the cartoon, or any animated
version of Thor before. Why is he on the list then, you ask?
Duh! Cause I know he turns into Chris Hemsworth!
7. Peter pan - Pips - Ferngully
So here is Pips instead!!
He basically looks as if Peter Pan, became a teenager, grew
a mullet, took steroids, took his shirt off and sprouted wings. Who would’t
enjoy that!?
The lead female in his movie appearantly. Because she was a
total tease, and fell for zack the blonde human instead. And it made Pips and
angry little bastard,
 |
| above, angry Pips |
which made him hot! So take that Zach, now Pips is on my
list and you’re forgotten.
Really, who would remember Zack? He poked trees with a
knife, and had a Walkman.. pssh a Walkman. Keep up with the times Ass hole. GO
PIPS!
6. Reginald – the mad hatter
I know, this is
totally wrong. But its not this hatter
| I'm not that sick yet |
Its this one, the one created by Brianna Garcia.
Why, you ask?
Um… I’m …not…sure…
Weeeeell.. he’s funny and, weird… and aggravates everyone.
Look, Alice needs a Love interest, and if her a short old
crazy fart it doesn’t work. And this way it does and. Look go Eff yourself,
this needs to happen!!!!
and that’s that!
....Seriously how did other Disney princes not make it on here…I’m
a sick person. I’ll blame It on the fever
5. Helia- winx
Yeah, I know, he looks not manly, and dresses like a girl,
and is like stick thin and..yeah. but
that’s just the animation. Its an Italian cartoon. Lets blame them. Also, its
target audience is girls 3-13 they don’t know what a man is, they just like
pretty.
I just like his personality, he’s a specialist (which means
he goes to a school of heroes, that use magic weapons and fly ships and all
kinds of futuristic rides) he was the best, until he turned into a pacifist. A tortured
soul. Which means he just tells the teachers to fuck themselves and fight their
own dragons, while he paints and writes poetry and composes things.
He sounds like a lady right? NO! there’s this one moment
where all his team mates are gonna get owned by a huge beast, and he’s just
watching like a jerk. But it so happens that the girl he likes gets into perils
way, and stopps the 1000 ton beast in one move!!
 |
| "fucking loosers, I can do ti one handed, with thread!" |
Now that’s a gentlemen… (once
she’s out of danger, he releases the thing and abandons his team mates again and goes back to poetry)
 |
| la la la roses, la la pacifist |
If this was intended, for girls whose genitalia was
awakening and tingling for the first time, I asure you he would not dress like
a girl, and he would not wear glitter. He would just be a poetry writing jerk,
with semi translucent hair. HOT!
4. Garret – quest for Camelot
He might not be particularly the hottest (then again, my
list so far doesn’t speak wonders of me) but I Totally adored him and I still
do. He’s Blind! And an Outcast. He’s a
blind outcast with an attitude who hates people that see!!
Another asshole, who goes out of his way to be an asshole
But then he goes and gets all hurt and stuff, and sings
about seeing things because SHE is there (super romantic because HE’S BLIND)
Yeah, he secured a way into her pants with that song!
3. John Rolfe
 |
| moodily staring into the horizon, best impression guaranteed |
As I was looking through all the Disney princes that did not
make it into my list, when I in fact had to choose at least one, I went with John
Rolfe. Because he’s a gentlemen, and has a code of honor, and manners and is
all society appropriate and stuff,
 |
| ahem |
and still falls for the girl who is not.
AND he beat John Smith! CHA! Yeah sure, Smith was all hot
and stuff, but he was all outcasty himself, so its not as hot. And Rolfe stealing the girl from the guy who
pretty much came back from the dead. Makes him even awesomer, because he let
her go! And still she chose him! Take that smith, if you wanted her, you should
have let her father die!
2.Flynn Ryder
I’m not calling him a Disney prince, because he is in a
category of his own.
He’s hot! He knows it, he’s all suave and bad boyish. He’s a
fucking thief! He’s constantly trying to destroy Rapunzel’s spirit by exposing
her to horrors....
| and beating her with a chandeabra |
. And he ends up falling for her precisely because she can’t be
broken! (except for a braid… seriously Disney? 10000 miles of loose hair, and
nothing happens, shorten that to a 10 foot braid and dramatic music.. boom! Tangled
in a branch! She should have fallen backwards the moment her hair was braided
in the first place!)
Any who. Flynn climbs towers and rescues her by sacrificing
himself. and when he is saved, he spoils the potential most romantic line in
the movie, by saying “I always had a thing for brunettes” intead of something
like “it wasn’t the hair, it was you!” because you know.. fuck romance!
He’s
Flynn Rider!
1. Zuko – avatar, the last Airbender
| ignore the bald side...yes i'm that vain... |
Yeah. Yell at me or whatever. But, he’s all dark, and tragic
. and a bad guy. With a bad haircut. And evolves into awesomeness.
 |
| I agree completely |
I’m a sucker for the bad boys with big tempers, who simmer
down by girls with even bigger tempers. They get put in their place! Yeah! And pretend
that they don’t. CUTE! Any way. Tragic,
with a burnt scar on his face, looking for his own destiny. Outcasty and
traitor to everyone. YEAH!
And he makes fire with his hands!! He’s perfect!! I would
never have to use a microwave again!!!
Oh yeah, he’s also a prince heir to a country… that’s a
bonus
That concludes my very effing strange list of hottest
animated guys (NOT COUNTING ANIME, that is a different list) what do they
all have in common? Hair! Long hair. Every-single-one
What does that say about me? I base my lists on the
appearance of hair! ….I mean I didn’t even like zuko when he was bald. Or when
he had a buzz cut.. then he let his hair grow and boom. Top of the list.
I’m a terrible person…but....
